i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
