Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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