yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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