I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
kristin has been a bad kristin
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize