Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize