Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
