we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just invented taco cereal.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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