this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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