I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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