I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
