You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
