Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
