I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
