You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
