I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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