he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
