I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
This is classic penis vs brain.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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