Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Randomize
