Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Randomize
