Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
vagina is talking i cant
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
