Hey man sorry I got all grabby
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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