my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
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