This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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