I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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