People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
