Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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