Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize