just tell him i said nine months
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
