Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize