Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
We had to coat check the pizza.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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