I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
i now understand why vodka
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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