No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
