i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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