Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
