So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
