Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
