Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
