Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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