you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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