Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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