Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Randomize
