It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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