how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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