just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
