So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
