if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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