Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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