i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize