I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
did i just pee glitter
Randomize
