What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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