but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You can't just leave with hair like that
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
